Talking about Advent: Love

As we go into the final week  before celebrating Jesus Christ’s birth, the final focus of Advent is love. Love is a word that people use in many different contexts; the varied use of the word muddles the true definition of love from the Bible.

Jesus gave us an important command before He left: “A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another. By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.” [John 13:34-35 ESV] Jesus wanted the world to see how His followers had love for each other and know them for it. John, in 1 John, expands the definition of love when he says, “We love because He first loved us” [1 John 4:19 ESV]. This reveals  that our  love comes from God and through Jesus’s examples and actions.

We see many examples of Jesus’ love throughout the gospel. He cared for the poor and needy, the sick and the lonely, offering them actual truth and help. In fact, when friends of a lame man broke through the ceiling of a building to reach Jesus, Jesus didn’t heal the man first; Jesus forgave the man’s sins. Jesus only healed the man so that “you [the Pharisees and crowds] may know that the Son of Man has authority on earth to forgive sins”. [Luke 5:24a ESV] Jesus rebuked those in sin and hypocrisy and offered help to the outcast like His healing of the leper. We can understand  from this example that love is not a feeling as many people describe. Stated another way, love  is something that doesn’t depend on the feelings of people, but on God’s truth. When we love someone in a true, Godly manner, we do what is best for them, even though  it might be uncomfortable in the short term. Jesus made many people uncomfortable, and He did not shy away from saying the truth. In fact, many people turned away from Jesus because of His preaching. The Pharisees hated His preaching so much they sought to have Him crucified.

When talking about love with your children, use some examples from Jesus’s life, like the paralyzed man who Jesus forgave first. This is an excellent example because it’s obvious that Jesus saw the man’s sin was far more important to address than the fact that he was paralyzed. Now, the man thought very differently. In this story, the healing of this man is secondary while the forgiveness is the important part. As I have taught many children, Jesus saw that this man’s sin was the bigger problem, just like it is with everyone. Everyone has problems, whether it’s health, finances, relationships, or other things. However, every time, the biggest problem in a person’s life is their sin and whether they have sought  forgiveness from God, whether they have accepted salvation by placing their faith in the death and resurrection of Jesus.

There are also examples from the child’s life that can help the child understand how love works. I use examples of good parenting to show the child that their parent loves them and doesn’t do everything they want. A child might want many, many things: toys, ice cream for every meal, staying up all night, not going to school, or maybe that you buy whatever they want in the grocery store. However, would any parent agree to all these? Of course not. A loving parent would know that ice cream for every meal would be horrible for the child, and so a loving parent would say no. Going even further, the Bible says a loving parent disciplines a child, so you can use your discipline of your child as an example. If you send your child to their room because they hit their sibling, you can talk with them and say something like, “I disciplined you because I love you so much, and I want what’s best for you. God made your sibling in His image and therefore your sibling is precious. Hitting your sibling is sin, against God and your sibling.” This could be an excellent time to wrap it back to God, because God always does what is best for us, but that’s not always what we want in the moment. God does this because He loves us better and deeper than anyone else.